aerodynamic | INBOX for purgastory

[ this is true, and yet. ]

I'm not going to lie to you and say I don't think you're excellent at handling things.
Just like I'm not going to say I know it doesn't mean much for me to say I wish you didn't have to.
Wishing doesn't change what you have to do or what's happened.
But it'd be nice if things weren't fucked up for you once or twice.

[ well.

he'll just reach out then, placing a hand atop yosuke's head. he doesn't ruffle his hair annoyingly this time. it's just an affectionate, gentle touch from a rough, calloused hand that's seen way too much violence and blood. ]

... meeting you has been pretty good.

[ and he knows what yosuke means. that sometimes it'd be nice if tobari wasn't inherently thrown into terrible situations just by nature of existing, or it didn't feel like everything in his life had gone wrong.

... but he means it, sincerely, that there are still some things that have gone right. ]

[ he keeps his head bowed for a second while this happens, and he's actually going to send tobari through the ice himself. he will not, but hearing that is both good and confusing. he's happy that they've met and he's made an impact, but also he's still a fairly average person to have met.

maybe that's the point. he doesn't quite say anything again, but he also is less hesitant to scooch closer and curl against him. is it for warmth? is it comfort? is it both? debatable. ]

You already know how I feel about that, too.

[ now he really does wish they'd met sooner knowing that he may stay dead after this. ]

[ they sure are stuck on the ice, but it's fine. when yosuke scooches in closer to him, tobari lifts his arm just enough to make it easier for him to tuck himself in in a half-hug. the brotherly type of affection is easier, but tobari's not against being tactile when the moment calls for it.

realizing that someone you started to see as family is dead seems like as good a time as any to call for it. ]

Mm. I do. But the time we get moving forward is plenty for me.

[ because it's time that he didn't have ]

So just keep putting one foot in front of the other for me, alright?

[ too many of you people are sick or dead or are going back to doomed circumstances and it sucks!! it sucks on top of saki-senpai's death from last year and yu moving away and it just adds to the pile of people yosuke's grown to care about being pulled out of his reach. so yes, tobari has to deal with this. ]

I'm trying, man. Trust me.
I know we gotta be grateful you have the extra time here, but I guess I'm selfish. I want more than that.

[ he would love if they could figure out how to not let tobari be dead, but he's here for suzune and he already knows how this is gonna go. ]

[ I THINK YOSUKE IS THE ONE DEALING WITH THIS? it's fine. tobari will just let him stay here in a little half hug. he'll pat the top of his head in slow, repetitive motions... ]

That's not selfish. It's reasonable. No one ever wants to say goodbye.

[ . . . but they have to. whether it be at the end of this weird purgatory journey, or another time. ]

[ he will allow this for this specific instance because he did in fact learn his big brother proxy is a corpse, thanks. ]

Yeah. It was already gonna be bad enough saying goodbye when we get out of here, but this is next level.
I don't know. We have time, but it's never enough.
I don't know how to get past that part.

INBOX for purgastory

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