aerodynamic | INBOX for purgastory

why scared i can read your messages and mind now 🤐

but im glad youre doing alright
id be disappointed if you werent and you hesitated to text me

im also okayish lmao
kinda decided id just stay in today
we can cancel last week

ok u cant read my mind from here so i think im safe
... wait really?

[ sorry, look, he likes raf a lot and he has become a needy dog who just shows up to bug him when he sees him but the idea that he'd actually say that still surprises him. ]

consider last week cancelled then
this weeks also kinda...
the mind thing is weird dude
like i am learning 2 much about some of u that i do not think u want me to know
cant say i blame u for staying in but ive been out at the star place a lot
may as well b4 its gone

[ when he's asked "wait really," he feels weird...

if just because he also typed it more naturally than he expected. ]

yeah unlike a certain someone i mean what i say

[ jk, he believes yosuke would maybe think of him. maybe. ]

fr??? i cant tell if youre convincing me to come out or telling me i should stay in

do you usually like looking at the stars

srsly what do i have 2 do to convince u i actually like u

[ please spare him!! ]

ya
u can come if u want im just practicing while its empty
i think theyre nice. couldnt always see them in the city but inabas in the country so u can see them for basically forever

i dun knoooow you could start by acting cute again

[ he's not serious...

when will he let that go... ]

practicing?
for when you get home???
should i help you roleplay

wafayel pwease come join me? 🥺

damnit, im not doing that!
im kinda scared to ask what ur actually thinking but no its just music stuff
altho now im wondering what u think roleplaying would do here...
either way u can come by or not obvs this is ok 2

wafayel is cwoming naooo 🫳🥺

[ brb, he's heading over. ]

[ ... and the first thing he says is: ] Is that cutie Yosuke over there?

I can't believe you actually did it...

[ welcome. we are probably on the deck area of the star room and he has a few pillows behind him as he leans against a wall. rafayel probably hears a slower version of this and when he appears he finds yosuke on the ground with his headphones on and a yellow-orange guitar in his hands. one of his ears is uncovered though so he does actually hear him and immediately rolls his eyes. ]

Well apparently it's the only way to get you to stop thinking I don't like hanging out with you, so some sacrifices had to be made. But don't make me do it again. [ he offers a grin though. ] Hey.

[ a normal person probably would have felt embarrassed for misunderstanding what he meant by practice, but... rafayel is impervious to it in moments like these. instead, he simply listens along until yosuke finally drags his attention back to him. he gives an easygoing kind of shrug. ]

So you wanted me that bad? [ lol, but that said he's also coming to settle right next to him. ]

But, you're good. I see what you mean now.

[ it's hard to say if he actually got what rafayel meant or if he's just sidestepping it, but he also figures the man isn't going to care because he'll brush it off. ]

Sure. I'd never reject your company. [ he turns this back around on him, and he plucks the strings a little. this close he can probably hear that the headphones are playing the same song and yosuke's trying to figure out how to play by ear alone. ] But thanks. I don't think I'm that good since I'm still learning, but I've been playing for a little while now. It was in one of the boxes with my name on it.

[ he smiles a bit at that, even if he tries to hide it behind his hand. ]

Oh, so it was yours from before or something?

[ a slight tilt of his head, his eyes mostly curious. ]

Is there a reason you chose this song?

Yeah, it usually lives in my room. There was a similar one in my trailer from a few weeks ago that I got to play with but this one feels better. It's... nice, you know? Having something to do when I'm not at work or school and I just want to do something else.

[ what he means is it's a nice creative outlet and it's something he genuinely likes and it's for himself more than anything. ]

It's easy to pick up from listening. [ he stops playing to gesture to his headphones. ] And it's... you know. I like it, I get it, that kind of thing.

True, they did leave us to figure out our own enrichment. [ like they're pets... ]

Guess this is like your version of going out and finding inspiration. I like this look on you.

You ever wonder who the hell "they" even are? Like... how did people get stuck here, and who contacted us to go rescue them? They really did leave us to our own devices though. [ "and some people went more wild than others."

but there's a little grin. ]

Thanks, I think. I'm still... figuring out a look, I guess. [ hm. that's one way to put it. ] Kinda why I wanted to apologize again for being weird last week.

All the time, actually. [ who were they to have struck some sort of deal or arrangement with them all like this? it's weirder of a concept to think they could be someone who could comprehend their desperation too... and that was kind of scary. ]

You don't have to apologize, silly. [ he uses those words more easily than he thinks, but maybe it's because he's mostly been disarmed by yosuke. that's also a strange thought, however... and so rafayel avoids thinking about it. ] It's nice to see passion. Especially, as we get older... people tend to lose sight of that kind of thing. Or take it for granted.

It's... something I think about a lot. We saw that one guardian or whatever who showed us what we came here for, but it's not like anybody was contacting us after that. They exist, but... makes you wonder if those are the ones we have to reach in the maze before we can rescue the people we came here for.

[ but that's all just idle thoughts. ]

It's nothing we can do right now though, I guess. [ the notion that he doesn't have to apologize is kind of nice, given the way his shoulders drop just a tiny bit. he doesn't entirely agree because rafayel's been nothing but nice to him and he's been kind of all over the place, but he's trying to get better at just accepting these things. instead, he chooses to focus on the second piece. ]

To be honest, I think I was starting to lose it for a little while back home. Being here's kinda reframed everything and steered me in the right direction again. Or, like, a direction. We'll see if it's the right one. But... I don't disagree. It's not something that should be lost or taken for granted. I don't want to be there.

It's only natural. I think most people want to put a face, or even a general appearance to their enemies. ... Well, maybe not even that. [ it's a lot more complicated, or so he gets the feeling. but, he does nod in agreement that there's not much they could do.

all they can do is persist. ]

You lost it even back at home...? [ ... ] Purpose is sometimes hard to find. Or other times, we become soooo fixated on it, that we sort of lose sight of everything else. I think you're right that being here... did change things.

Not going to lie, I never thought I had to think this much outside of what I normally do.

At least giving it a form instead of a weird vague concept... some people are still pretty mad all of this is happening to us even though we agreed. It's easier to be mad if we have something to be mad at. I don't even know if I can be mad. I wish I understood why, but at the end of it it doesn't matter because I'd do whatever it takes to save who I came for.

[ all they can do is persist. he's playing a different song at this point, something slow and easy as he nods to the question. ]

I don't know if I had it before the murders started. And then I got my Persona and we were working as a team and I had a purpose. But now that the case is officially over and the world is safe, and without the person who gave me a purpose, it was like... hard, I guess. To care about the future or know what I would care enough about to pursue. Being here has helped me really think about it, and talking to you guys has also helped. Like seeing other paths can exist.

[ though he lets his gaze slide back over to rafayel. ]

I never did ask what it is you're really going back to when we leave, did I?

[ it's true that people tended to operate better when they comprehended exactly what they were up against. he doesn't argue with that. it's similar to having a tangible goal, or something one could genuinely perceive. perhaps, that's why this maze is so difficult for them all. it's almost as if they traverse it entirely blind to what the end brings, but also just as ignorant to all of which they leave behind... if there is anything like that.

when yosuke switches songs, it also allows rafayel to mentally switch gears. ]

It seems like that person changed your life dramatically. Then without them, you lost sight of what you were doing this all for. I don't think there's any shame in that. Even if we pursue what we desire... at the end of the day, things just look and feel different depending on who's right next to you, yeah? [ not that their purpose has to be tied to a specific person, but he's sure the ride is that much more valuable.

something to savor, and just like that... he's a bit surprised at the question. he gives it a good pause, before: ] To be honest, I'm not sure yet. I've changed my mind enough times, and I'm not sure what the right answer is. But, I do have someone to look after first and foremost.

Is it the same for you?

[ despite rafayel not actually expressing all of that, yeah, that's basically where yosuke is with it. a tangibility, and yet they don't know what's ahead and can't look back.

instead, they move on, and likewise he allows the shift in conversation as easily as the shift in the melody. ]

I wouldn't be alive without them. [ which sounds dramatic but also, uh, this is very literal, his shadow would have just murdered him. ] It's like... I've been giving it some thought. If I want to go to college, if I want to stay in Inaba, if I want to pursue music seriously in college, Elysium pointed out humanitarian efforts was an option, stuff like that. All of these things I hadn't really considered, and I don't know what one it'll be but you're right. It all looks and feels different depending who's still there.

[ there's an intrigued little noise because he did assume the guy had it all figured out, and maybe it feels a little better to know he's not the only one still changing his mind and not knowing the right answer. ]

Your bodyguard, right? I remember you mentioned her. [ there's a pause though because is it the same? he supposes it is. ] ... I'm pretty sure I'm in love with my best friend. I don't know what to do with that information, but it doesn't change that I have to look after him first and foremost, even if we're separated at home again.

Those are all really important decisions. I also think it's okay to give yourself the room to think and try different things out. [ he gives a nod. ] I don't think going into music is such a bad idea if that's what really interests you. I find there's less room for regrets if you follow your heart. [ ... ] Also, like not to sound like an oldie, but you're definitely at the right age to take your time. You have your whole life ahead of you.

Yeah, that's the right attitude. [ he chuckles just a little bit. ] It only took us being here to figure it out, no big deal. [ but, it's not a bad thing to come out of this with a new sense of resolve, at least. ]

Try telling that to my parents. [ wry. the hanamuras are supportive of their son, but yosuke's also not disillusioned enough to think they'd be totally fine with him not making a decision about his future whether that's college or working at junes full-time. ] I hadn't really thought about music seriously until other people mentioned it here because I don't know what I could do with it, but it's fun? And if I'm going to do something for the rest of my life I'd prefer not to hate it.

[ there's a snort though. ]

I keep forgetting you're kinda ancient when you look the way you do. [ idly. but... ] I don't think it makes you sound old. I think it sounds like something I should probably hear and maybe it'll stick. I don't know what life looks like on the other side of this, but I guess... I should just be grateful I have one to go back to.

[ unlike some of these other people. ]

You think maybe that was the point of this whole thing? Kicking us into gear to learn these lessons.

Exactly, uh... don't they have that quote about doing something you love, yadda yadda, not working a day of your life? [ he's probably missing a few important details out of that, but he seems to say it with the same easygoing sort of confidence as anything else he says.

but, ANCIENT!?!? excuse him? he is the youngest sea god? but he barely has time to let that sink in, before he ponders on yosuke's last point. in a way, he's impressed that yosuke can tie a lot of this back to their actual "reason" for being here.

... and he can't say it feels entirely wrong. ] It might be. Honestly, wouldn't it be easier to think of it that way. [ he looks up to the stars momentarily. ] Though, I'd also like to think as much as they force on us, we also fight back with an intensity and passion they may not have expected. So I think that says just as much about the people here. You included, of course.

[ but, he's not going to make eye contact when he says that...

he doesn't want to make it too personal. ]

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